GutterMonger

Yeah, I know I’ve been really bad lately (spank me…please?) and haven’t written here in a really long time.  I’ve been busy on some of my other projects.  And not just cooking and cleaning…the former I do really well, and the latter…well, not so good.  But isn’t food and sex far more important than a clean house?  I think it is, so that’s what matters.

I feel like I have to write about this to get it off my chest (my boobs are plenty big enough and quite frankly, there is no room for any issues…only the boobies).  I was downtown LA today and noticed something that I’ve seen a lot, but didn’t feel compelled to write about until now.  What in the hell is up with all the girlie looking and gay guys with all the women?  I’m not using the term women lightly either.  If you’re visibly over the age of 25, you’re called a woman in my book.

Are women that afraid of being with a manly looking man?  I’ve always had a rule, that I would not date a guy whose butt is smaller than my own.  If you’re a guy…and you wear skinny jeans, or worse, girls’ skinny jeans…you’ve broken that rule and you aren’t getting into my bed.

It’s time for women to fucking grow up and except the fact that they are no longer 12 years old and pining away for the Jonas Brothers or their dopplegangers.  Take a chance on a man and quit hiding behind your “but I don’t want to get hurt again” or “but the last guy I was with…” bullshit.  You’re an adult, and with that comes some inherent risk in the actions you take.  Suck it up sister!

Okay, I’m so steamed up…I’ve got to bust into my cellar and grab a great bottle of red then make a booty call to the most well hung stud in my book.

I promise to be a good girl and post more.

read comments (0)

Those crazy kids in Oz (Australia) have created Sensory Drinks. What’s that you ask? If you order one of these Sensory drinks, you get escorted to a private area, are served the drink, asked to put on a blindfold and earphones (which are hooked up to an ipod with specially selected tunes), then get misted by a server for 18 minutes.

“The sensory cocktails work like this: order the daiquiri, and you’re tucked into a semiprivate spot where you sip your drink blindfolded while listening to 18 minutes of Cuban music on an iPod. All the while, a waitress spritzes you with a cigar mist made by simmering crumbled cigars in water and simple syrup.

The idea, said Grant Collins, Zeta’s consulting mixologist, is “to heighten the link between the drink and the experience. Listening to the music makes your mind drift, and the blindfold heightens your sense of smell.” And the smoky mist? It’s a sensory trick to make you think you’re in Havana.”

So they’ve got the “Tiki” which gives the Havana, Cuba experience, the Sea Breeze which is destined to make you feel like you’re sitting on the beach sipping your cocktail, and a Martini that plays a Rat Pack soundtrack to make you feel like you’re in New York. Something tells me that if this thing catches on and ends up here in the States…it’s going to “progress” into something really bizarre. Like…Sex on the Beach – as the woman is sipping her fruity libation, Beach Boy tunes are piped through her headphones, a salt spray is misted around her, while the waiter slaps her face with his cock. I just don’t see this ending well.

read comments (0)

While roaming around on the internets this week…I ran across this interesting item. It looks like it could be a nice little stand alone device for some unbelievable clitoris stimulation or possibly and attachment for one of my little mechanical feel good toys doesn’t it? It even comes in several versions. There’s the “moose,” “caribou,” “elk,” and “whitetail deer.” All of which have a slightly different design. They’re made out of sterling silver and come in a pretty little wooden display box. But alas, it is not to be….they are rings that are carried in a Canadian souvenir shop. But hey, in my house….one of my important rules is that most things must have a dual purpose. Problem solved….I’m buying 2. The “moose” and the “whitetail deer.” Happy hunting!!!!

read comments (0)